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本帖最后由 下沙热线 于 2011-7-27 10:13 编辑
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( `8 U( F0 `) w' h1)TOM'S EXCUSE 5 T* Q+ ^. n5 ?
Teacher: Tom, why are you late for school every day?
5 @+ x: t& d* S6 Y* `; ?$ o# mTom: Every time I come to the corner, a sign says, "School-Go
# F- y$ B6 @5 M. eSlow".
2 q7 ]9 @8 M5 p: u汤姆的借口 6 ?8 a# I# d; H. L0 B
老师:汤姆,您为什么每天上学迟到? 9 E. n( J x+ r& t+ `: w0 B# i
汤姆:我每次路过拐角,一个路标上面写着:"学校----慢行。" : Q3 Z4 I O+ `, B
DID YOUR DAD... $ z) d* j& j* P5 T' F! ~/ F7 }) a8 n
2)Tom call Jim's name:"I can't bear such a foolish!" 5 E& b3 {7 Z0 |
and Jim say:"You mother could (bear)!"
0 u6 O) P9 O. p, @' J$ d汤姆对着吉姆骂道:"我受不了你这个苯蛋了!"
r L; I) o8 ~1 N# m* R吉姆说:"你妈妈能!"
v% F0 u$ i. k附:bear 有两重意思:"生"和"忍受"这个笑话正是根据这点. j- Z1 t( H# d0 P# b! d
3)Tom call Jim's name:"I can't bear such a foolish!"
3 O& u0 L+ J! g; h+ @7 L. ~6 Land Jim say:"You mother could (bear)!"
9 A3 Y7 s7 s' I* N3 U# U5 t汤姆对着吉姆骂道:"我受不了你这个苯蛋了!"
# ^5 a1 l2 V. e$ m吉姆说:"你妈妈能!" , ]2 }; @' O% |" p/ _
附:bear 有两重意思:"生"和"忍受"这个笑话正是根据这点. ) F' X1 u% @: K, i9 ]- d* U( L. ?4 ]# n
4)A man goes to church and starts talking to God. He says: "God, what is a million dollars to you?" and God says: "A penny", then the man says: "God, what is a million years to you?" and God says: "a second", then the man says: "God, can I have a penny?" and God says "In a second" , Y+ _' f! j# H
一男子进入教堂和上帝对话.他问:"主啊, 一百万美元对你意味着多少?"上帝回答:"一便士."男子又问:"那一百万年呢?"上帝说:"一秒钟."最后男子请求道:"上帝,我能得到一便士吗?"上帝回答:"过一秒钟."
8 R: o, L* p1 V, v+ T2 R5)Mother sent Tommy to the store across the street to buy a good box of matches.When Tommy came back,mother asked him,”Did you buy a good box of matches?” 0 {# b# w6 y/ Q
“Yes,Mum.”Tommy replied,”I have tried them all.” 7 @) ~, r: O( \5 J8 Y
一盒小火柴
+ c' H, m; U" k7 p" M; \2 I8 w/ Y( U妈妈让汤米去马路对面的商店里买一盒好用的火柴。汤米回来后,妈妈问他,“你买的是好用的火柴吗?” ) O Q# a1 W* `6 N" B6 |
“是的,妈妈。”汤米回答,“我把它们都试过了。”
9 D6 z$ F' {+ Q, F- Y' }6)Father:Uh,oh,I think I just made an illegal right-hand turn. 3 v% \% I0 Z" {% b) a& |/ ]
Susie:That is okay ,dad,the policeman behind you just did the same thing!
) u/ j3 j* D v* b. k) U! J开车 + G9 e( P+ X4 B: r) m+ q' d
父亲:哎呀,我刚才违规右转弯了。 : o( C. Z, b/ Y
苏西:没事,爸,跟在你后面的警察也这么转了。 8 i. e6 W, U% Q
7)Little Robert asked his mother for tow cents.”What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?” ' b5 r! z# d w) y' P) j
“I gave it to a poor old woman,”he answered.
; Z! @( N ^) E# D% w$ C. u- r“You’er a good boy,”said the mother proudly.”Here are tow cents more.But why are you so interested in the old woman?” 0 d4 h5 F0 Y V) a7 [" ]% p
“She is the one who sells the candy.”
) F- d& p9 c8 b* m w, |6 @好孩子 * e2 ~7 d w: w% Z5 ?1 i: D
小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。 6 _3 D( l# P6 X+ C7 K
“昨天给你的钱干什么了?” 8 M" T5 F) D' v( X0 }9 Z
“我给了一个可怜的老太婆。”他回答说。“你真是一个好孩子,”妈妈骄傲地说. “再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢?” , Q3 v5 ^$ S7 E6 R8 v+ o
“她是个卖糖果的。” 0 s* k& M. E7 ]4 l9 r
8)Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked,”What happened?” % O# ^/ G+ `! _5 n
“A kid bit me,”replied Ivan. ) p8 z2 D9 z5 i5 J1 D
“Would you recognize him if you sew him again?”asked his mother. 8 E; K8 P1 G# t5 @9 X4 d& L4 i
“I’d know him any where,”said Ivan.”I have his ear in my pocket.”
' O F" j8 I, @3 W他的耳朵在我的衣兜里
) D# F/ D6 c7 h: S& N% ?% j伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问,“发生了什么事?”
5 I# h* @2 J' B0 M9 W* h“一个男孩咬了我一口。”伊凡说。
7 I a; L, M; A! F$ p- L8 q“再见到他你能认出来吗?”妈妈问。 : t3 s9 {) q+ s5 b6 g4 N2 z0 S
“他走到哪里我都能认出他,”伊凡说,“他的耳朵还在我的衣兜里。”
i2 e% u; g3 _. V) l- _6 d9)Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?
' _4 h3 M" D* k, H0 YStudent: I cannot point out but I know the answer. + X/ Y7 J$ {" i s; a
Teacher: Please tell us.
4 J; g: I4 p7 v. \% TStudent: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow. ! C+ ?+ a! l" N4 H. z8 v
! W* z8 y( K$ |* G! ^8 F* Y两只鸟
: M0 v* Q! c! A t老师: 这儿有两只鸟,一只是麻雀。谁能指出哪只是燕子,哪只是麻雀吗?
! b! v) Q& A5 @7 |! s# l0 l$ g0 Y学生:我指不出,但我知道答案。 . {4 c/ ? `1 l# J
老师:请说说看。 : j8 H5 V$ X& q6 a
学生:燕子旁边的就是麻雀,麻雀旁边的就是燕子。 |
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